“My Jean-Marc’s uncle was married to an English woman, and she told us once, a very long time ago, that in this world there are men of two kinds. The one, the knight, is the man possessing only strength and quality of moral character. He will never ask a lady to compromise her honor for less than a vow, and never, ever will he consider another once he has captured her heart. A knight keeps his vow, even when it hurts, and the honor of a knight is a thing a country is built upon. A knight comes along only seldom these days.
“Now, a blackguard is a man who can be found quite easily, for it is an easy thing to be a blackguard. He attempts to trick the young ladies into taking him home and caring for him, making them believe their honor can be given away as a mere trifle, offering no vow, and making only demands. The blackguard is to be avoided at all costs, for to settle for someone like him is to settle for something less than ideal…”
—Sophia Pasquelucci Italia, April 1945
Sophia Pasquelucci said of the blackguard that he is to be “avoided at all costs…”
Many a successful woman can live by those words of wisdom. To be caught up, even temporarily, with a blackguard, guarantees a negatively-life-changing-event—of which your chances of recovery are slim to none.
I still pray for a woman I met on my first book tour. We were traveling in the desert southwest when we happened upon a young lady who’d been visited by a blackguard. I will call her “Bella,” though that is not her real name. By the time we met Bella the blackguard had long gone, but he’d left his mark on her life. She was raising two of his children on her own, and he didn’t offer a dime of support or a moment of his time. The blackguard left her shortly into her second pregnancy and Bella was devastated. Hopefully she hasn’t been infected with AIDS.
Bella knows our Lord Jesus now and she reads her Bible every day. She finds comfort in His healing Word, but how she wishes she could undo her experience with the blackguard. His reputation as a womanizer was well-known in her small town, yet she found him irresistible. She couldn’t stay away from him, especially when he told her he loved her.
Bella’s blackguard was easy to spot—he had a reputation. But there are blackguards in disguise who roam freely among us—Sophia called them “Pretenders.”
To be caught up with a Pretender is worse than being with an outright blackguard. The Pretender has what appears to be a flawless life: talented, yet overtly humble, great job, great reputation, soothing words, perfect relationships with others, unending circles of friends—the list can go on and on. But, look beyond that Pretender’s aforementioned coverings. Does he/she (yes…unfortunately a Pretender can also be a woman) give their life to the Lord?
I gave Bella a copy of my book and as she read Sophia’s description of the blackguard she began to weep.
In the book The Pretender: A Blackguard in Disguise, there are these two types of men. One is a true knight who will sacrifice his own needs and desires as a man so that a little boy will have a father. The Pretender, on the other hand, doesn’t do anything unless it benefits his agenda. Even when he appears to work for the Lord’s glory, it’s really only to further his own professional future.
I pray for Bella, that a knight comes along and erases the scars the blackguard left behind. I pray for a knight who is willing to be a father to her babies (probably teenagers by now) and a loving husband to Bella.
Ladies, if your love interest has a reputation for excesses of any kind, i.e., booze, drugs, violence, women, etc., and especially if those excesses are public knowledge (the courts), or if he asks you to compromise your honor (this is a big indication) end the relationship without explanation. Your God-given life is far more precious than a moment of excess or ecstasy. And in that squandered moment you may find yourself scarred for life, or even without your life.
There are many good men out there—real men willing to sacrifice for the woman they love just as Christ sacrificed Himself for the Church (Ephesians 5:25). Those men are knights and I praise God every day for the one He sent to me!
Don’t forget, our 2nd Print Edition will be available on August 19, 2017. Sign up for our newsletter and be entered in a drawing for a free book and other prizes.
Or, better yet, come over to Prayerfest, listen to the great free music, and get a copy of The Pretender. There will be free prizes there as well!
© 2017 Ta`Mara Hanscom